Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Family Whack A Mole...

I think my family might be jinxed....yep...or at least the chicks are...maybe my husband put some sort of curse on us as payback for all the hormonal roller coasters we put him on...the other day all of the girls in the fam received some sort of groovy head started with me...which is only fitting being the matriarch and all....I gotta lead by example you know. We were checking out at Goodwill and I was all excited because I found some bomb diggety old purses and was checking out the jewelry for some old beads...I lean in towards the glass counter to get a better look and BANG!!!!!!!!!! Mother fucksnot! I pegged my forehead on the metal bag holder thingy. Yea it was awesome....I freaked out the whole place with my yelling and my husband was oh so proud of the mad skills I least I scored some cool sunglasses bad they didn't cover up the welt on my we get home and my toddler heads off for a I can chill and take a Tylenol......but then all of sudden I hear some horrible screaming...I run into her room to find that she fell out of bed... and is laying half under the bed with her head wedged up against her dresser...she got a killer line down the side of her perfect cherub face from sticking the landing....poor worries...she's kinda like Edward Cullen and heals rather quickly....Later in the afternoon my now marked little kiddo decides that she wants to play some football...which is cool....buuuuuttttt...... she decided to toss me the ball when I wasn't expecting her to and well...let's just infant took one for the team....yea...nothing makes you feel more like a prize winning mother then letting your baby get pegged in the noggin.... and now two of them just got pinged....sweet. Once again no tiny sweetie just shook it off like a champ and returned to drooling all over's all good.
So now it's time to go get my teen from school...then we head off to the store to pick up stuff for dinner etc...and we were having a great time goofing off and being silly....till we leave...we load the little ones and groceries into the car...I'm all buckled in and my teeny bopper starts to get in....and SMACK!!!!.....door to face....yep...(sing it with me) du du du, another one bites the dust.....poor girl....she really jacked up her forehead...she looked fine by the next morning but I was certain my kids were going to get taken away.....considering they all got jenked within hours of each other.....I so need to invest in a few more ice packs....and perhaps some hockey face masks.........cuz let's face it....we are a gaggle of crazy, clumsy broads and unfortunately our faces and our humor are about the only few things we have going for us.....Lord knows we won't be champion tightrope walkers or anything. Well better go...I need to check on my dental insurance...just in case....Peace out!

1 comment:

  1. You might want to take a look at your family's life insurance policy. Being accident-prone, seems to be hereditary. Obama-Care doesn't cover this....At least, I don't think.