November is Diabetes awareness month.....I happen to have a Type 1 Diabetic child aka a T1D. She was diagnoses late last April....to be honest it's all still new and yet already old hat. I have to tell you....I fucking hate diabetes. I hate that she can't just grab a muffin and eat it on the way to school. She has to check her blood and count her carbs and then shoot up the proper amount of insulin then eat. Oh then we all pray it works...because in the world of diabetes..no matter what you do, no matter how on point you are....everything changes constantly and every damn thing affects you. While your kid packs his bag...stuffing in homework and gaming device and wonders what excuse he will give the teacher as to why he didn't do his homework....my T1D does all that and checks her emergency snacks, glucose monitor, test strips, insulin and double checks that her medical alert bracelet is on....oh and her "excuse" as to why something wasn't done or why she is late is because she was high or low and up all night correcting it....you know life and death... While your daughter comes home upset because someone didn't like her shoes....mine comes home and cries because a classmate told her she does all this testing and snacks and resting and water drinking and multiple nurse trips just to get attention. (I know it's wrong to want to punch a child in the face...so I will just pray that a squirrel bites him on the ass).... Your child can get new shoes...my child will always be diabetic.
Monday, November 16, 2015
Friday, August 28, 2015
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
So...I'm watching Bubble Guppies with my young children and my grand babies and this La La Loopsy commercial comes on. Cool. I love those dolls. Some of them are pretty rad.....right??? NOPE...like NOPE. This particular doll.....SHITS OUT A CHARM! THEN YOUR CHILD TAKES IT OUT OF IT'S PANTS AND WEARS THE FUCKING CHARM! Are you kidding me?!!!!!!???? What kind of 50 shades of fetish bullshit is with this? What friggen dumbasses at the LalaLoopsy factory thought this was a brilliant idea....no one along the way said..hey this is gross and kinky as fuck and we should all get canned for even thinking it's ok. Let's think back here....remember when they wanted to take the drunks and wenches out of the Pirates Of The Caribbean ride at Disney? I guess so that young, impressionable children wouldn't think it's ok to grow up to be drunk whores or something.....but hey....digging for things to wear out of some steaming, hot shit....now that's totally ok. WTF. Obviously Susie The Charm Crapper will not be on the list for Santa this year..... neither will the wiener dog game that apparently takes a dump on the board. What happened to thing's like pick up sticks...not that my demon spawn even pick up their room much less a bunch of pointy damn sticks I just paid $7.99 for. Perhaps the answer is....wine...lots of cheap boxed wine (for me not the kids you idiot) Because...well I loved those dirty wenches at Disney!!!! Peace Out!
Friday, July 4, 2014
Yes...I have been gone awhile....my bad. I want to be a cat...a house cat...not a lion or cougar (well maybe a cougar in the terms of having a fine young hottie..nah...young people piss me off...nevermind) When you're a cat it's ok to be just ridiculously fat...people LOVE a big rolly polly cat. The chunkier the better. You get to lounge around the house all day just fat as hell and lazy... people think it's the best thing ever. BUT if you are a human and obese they hate you and tell you to go away. #nofatties Also if you are a voluptuous cat you don't have to wear clothes...fat girls gotta cover up or people are all....GROSS!!! Cover up your cankles!!!! (BTW I may have a bit of a cankle but my ass is amazing....) I think maybe I should find a BBW worshiper with an animal fetish...it's called Plushy Love or something....I could put on ears and a tail...we could play one of those fantasy scenes where he saves me from the pound, brings me home, puts me on the bed... he starts scratching my belly.... Sorry that's as far as my fantasy gets...not because I can't get kinky....HELLO...middle aged lady here....I am in my prime!!! I just have very undocumented yet wildly witnessed ADHD..so right when I get to the good stuff I'm all like....I should totally look up cat costumes on Pinterest!!!!! Then I get to the PC and decide to check FB first...only to start scrolling down and see all the skinny girls from high school posting marathon pics and talking about yoga...so I get all depressed and find a cupcake. (crackheads are stupid...cupcakes are totally the best high ever) After the cupcake I grab a glass of wine and sit on my sad little exercise bike and listen to some Robin Thicke (who would never fuck a fat girl)....tears run down my face while I hate myself and chug my cheap wine. Then Nicki Minage hits the Pandora and bam...I have hope.....She has a huge ass and is wickedly loved ....I start picking up the pace & ride that little bike like it's Adam Levine (before he had blonde hair)......I feel amazing...there is hope!!! Half hour later I'm all laying on the floor in a puddle of sweat, crying for another cupcake and wishing I was a cat :( FML Peace Out
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
L & M....L is for Lazy...and M is for masturbation. Yes for me they go together.... I am too lazy to masturbate....I hate it. I really really hate it. Not only do I have to do all the work to get myself off but then I have to wash my hand when I'm done...I can't just fall asleep. Why diddle myself anyways....it's not the same as getting some good oral or sex from a guy...and toys are dumb...I can't feel sexy while fucking a purple plastic dick with rabbit ears hanging off of it...I'd rather just drink a bottle of wine...watch 21 Jumpstreet and pass the fuck out. Maybe I'm weird....but didn't y'all already figure that out??? Its just not my thing...but I think a good cheesecake can fix any kind of pent up sexual frustrations I have... sorry about the TMI but I'm running out of ideas for this challenge so...Peace Out!
Saturday, April 13, 2013
J & K stand for Just Kidding....because I don't have anything....I am so behind and not feeling wicked creative so.... I thought J would be for jacking off...but I decided that M would be for masturbation ...well I guess I could still use Jacking off because M was only about me...and jacking off implies guys. What are your thoughts on dudes jerking it??? I think if they are in a relationship with me then they don't need to unless I ask them too for my entertainment.....or I am mad at them and am not giving up the honey pot...then fine...whack it....but you better be thinking of my boobies.... Guys all have this technique of jerking that I can not seem to replicate....so I am not into giving handjobs.....no way it can compare to their years and years of stroking it for themselves..... K.....what was K going to be about??? I don't know....Kangaroos??? Kegels??? OH....knowing me K was for Kinky..... I have found as I get older that my idea of Kinky has changed.... When I was a teen I wouldn't have sex in the light and I was only on bottom....now....well I still don't like the lights...my ass is massive....wish I had enjoyed my body in the light when I was younger...oh well. But things that would have freaked me out even in my 20's...now not so much...but I will never get into being peed on....or having extras...sex is for 2 people....I would lose my mind if two penises were trying to poke at me and I really don't want any vagina in my face. If that's your thing...then good for you...I will stick to fingering buttholes, slapping people around and my pierced nipples.... Well it's the weekend....y'all go have a few drinks and jack off or get kinky.....just make sure to tell me all about it! Peace Out!