Thursday, February 11, 2010

Cupid put the roses down!

It's that time of year again...Valentines....yep the time of year where you either feel great because you are in love or you feel like slitting your wrists because you are alone or with someone you don't love....I'm thrilled that I'm in a great marriage and will not be sitting at the bar wishing some random guy would buy me a drink and make feel desirable so that I don't have to go home and cry on the phone to my Grandmother and cat (yes, that has been done)....anywhoo...this time of year also drives me just flippen nuts...I really really hate all the commercials for jewelry and flowers and candy etc etc etc...don't get me wrong I like those things....and I love me some chocolate but dear Lord people....why oh why is it written in stone that I have to get a bracelet and a heart shaped box of chocolate covered crap?????? These things are not me...not at all....I think the boxed wine people need to make a Valentine version....that's right a bright red box of Sunset Blush and the Betty Crocker folks should have a heart shaped bowl of frosting that comes with a souvenir spoon. Instead of expensive earrings I would prefer some knock off sunglasses or perhaps a gift card for a tattoo...I also am not all about dinner reservations at some fancy steak about wings and beers at Hooters....I always always always am down for their fried pickles plus then I don't have to dress up...I can wear my favorite jeans and a Florida Gators sweatshirt....I love to be comfortable...I don't love to put my spanx on....bleh....who the hell wants to pry those off at the end of the night for some rolls busting out like a warm marshmallow....not the giant gasp of air I take when I can finally breath again...always makes for a romantic moment...I guess I prefer my white trash ways over pretending to be something I'm not and I can get a lot more buzzed by drinking cheap wine through a silly straw then I can sipping some silly overpriced "tini" .....
Well...gotta go...I'm headed to the store...going to pick up my husband's gifts...probably something wicked sexy like contact lens solution and a wrench. Peace out!

No comments:

Post a Comment