22 Positions In A One Night Stand

So...in a half drunk channel flipping evening I had over the weekend I saw something (I think) about someone getting 3 wishes but they only lasted 24 hours. I got to thinking about what I would do. I thought of several things....my first husband being covered in red ants, having my high school nemesis covered in hair, The Kardasians plagued with flesh eating bacteria....etc etc etc....but none of those really made me feel exceptionally happy....perhaps a bit delighted but not truly happy. After tons of thought I have my 3 wishes. 1. That all of my family and friends have one day of total bliss. No toe stubbing, all green lights, no financial worries etc etc etc. If only for one day I want all my loved ones to have just a phenomenal time. 2. I want anyone who hurts children to pass very large kidney stones. 3. I want to have a penis and balls. That's right....I NEED to know what it's like. I want to pee standing up wherever I want....outside, in a plant, off a bridge etc... I want to know what it feels like to "free ball", what it feels like to do jumping jacks with a dick swinging. I know how I feel when I get turned on but I can't even guess what it's like to have an erection...it's fascinating to me. Plus...think of all the inside info I could get....I would finally figure out how to give a decent hand job! I defiantly want to have sex with it....but I think it would be hard to find someone who will let me....after all...I only wished for a penis and balls...which means I still look like me. Kinda hard to find someone who will let me poke them. I would ask one of my friends but that would seriously change our relationship.....but come one.....I finally have a chance to feel what the big deal is...what millions of men have begged for, songs have been written about and wars have been fought over...ok maybe not but still the vagina has caused some epic issues. If I could experience the honey hole as a dude I most definitely would. But mostly I just want to walk around in a towel and then swing my cock around in circles...men always seem to do that....I don't understand why...it looks really stupid but since it's something they all do...I must try it. I'm sure there are several bad things that I would experience while having a penis....getting it caught in my zipper, squishing my balls and premature ejaculation but that would be helpful too....maybe be I could be more empathetic to male issues.....BWAHAHAHAHAHA....ok probably not....I'm sure I would just use that info for evil purposes..but hey I already used one of my wishes for something good....my sweet side has it's limits. So....to all my lady friends out there....if I somehow manage to find a genie to grant me my three wishes and I get my penis for a day and you find it in your heart to let me fuck you....I will totally not be wearing a condom.....they say bareback is the way to ride!!!! Peace out!

Twist Of Lime

T is for Tonic....as in Gin and Tonic. Now I know y'all have heard me talk about my undying love for boxed wine.....and I'd never kick a cold beer out of bed either but as far as cocktails go....gin and tonics are my thing. It all started several years ago when I had to take a work trip to Reno (woot woot).....my Aunt met me out there and we had THE BEST time. Lots of gambling, sight seeing, food.....and that's when she introduced me to gin and tonics. There we would sit...playing video poker, smoking cigarettes and sipping our cocktails in some dark bar of a casino. Seriously....one of my favorite memories of all time. So now every time I slurp down a G&T the nostalgia comes back and makes my drink just that much better. What's your fav drink????